Recording the Life of Someone With a Terminal Illness - Behind the Pod

There was one interview I did last year that felt more important than the rest.

It was one of the most fulfilling conversations I've ever had, and also the saddest.

Through our Reflections business, I'd been invited to help tell the life story of a man with a terminal illness. His end line was in sight - a date for assisted dying had been set.

He'd reached out to have his story captured in full, for his kids – and for their kids.

So I drove to his house in Auckland, knocked on his door and sat with him, asking him questions about the most interesting and insightful chapters of his life.

It was a beautiful conversation; heavy, purposeful and eloquent. I was struck by his clarity of thought.

“I used to think family was important,” he said. “But it’s not just important, it’s actually the only thing that matters. Family is everything.”

We spoke of work and loss, kids and jobs, funny stories and memorable moments. He farewelled his kids, and told them how much he loved them.

And after I pushed stop on the recording equipment, after two hours, we sat and wept together.

The experience had a profound effect on me. I thought about his life. I thought about his kids listening to the recording, I thought about what's really important in my life.

And I thought about my role. And my journey to get there. The gift of storytelling, or facilitating storytelling, feels like my most valuable contribution to society.

I love listening to people's stories, learning from them and sharing them. I love the gift of sharing such precious taonga. Too often our stories are lost.

And the wave of emotions crashed over me again a few months after he passed, when my phone buzzed.

"Just watched the recording you did with my brother"

"Thankyou"

Don't miss our episode next week with the incredible Gordy Walker.

Gordy was named Halberg coach of the decade in 2021... and after listening to this one - you'll understand why. It’s packed full of world class coaching and leadership insights, brilliantly articulated.

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